I've written funny poems, written a heap of those But sometimes all that rhyming gets up people's nose So I thought I'd try proper stand up and use words which didn't rhyme I enrolled in a stand up comedy course to become a stand up comic sublime
The first task we were given was to write down ten things that we hate Should be easy I thought, but I could barely think of eight Then we had to write down ten things which made us feel afraid Rebecca said the fear of revealing fears was one which on her mind weighed
Our teacher Rob, likes his lists of ten and I couldn't expostulate Because even if two were crap, you still had the remaining eight This is going quite well I thought, and I'll no longer sound like Pam Ayres Because, quite frankly, the stuff she does, seriously, does anyone really care
We listened to a bit of Derek and Clive, comedians from the past And I have to say their humour, it still packs quite a blast To call the buyer of their record a fool, well they didn't quite use those words And then play a few moments of silence, is the funniest thing I've ever heard
So I hope you like my attempt at not putting everything in verse I've just done a proper stand up routine, and you heard it here first!